Hey guys! Brandon here, The Sword’s winter intern. Sorry I haven’t blogged in a while, but I’ve been coming to terms with some pretty weird news. Last month, I tested positive for HIV, the virus that causes AIDS.
A lot of you might be wondering how in the world someone like me could possibly catch HIV, and believe me, I’ve been wondering pretty much the same thing these past few weeks. I’m young, I’m good looking, I’m white, and I’m not an intravenus drug user—so why me? I always practiced safe sex by asking my partners if they were clean and disease free before we fucked bareback (not to mention the fact that I’m almost always a top), so this whole thing has left me pretty perplexed. Why me?
In addition to all that, you might remember that I have always been a big praponent of staying safe by getting tested every few months (which obviously I did), so why am I the one with HIV? After taking all the precautions that I’ve taken, why am I the one who has to deal with HIV? Is this some sort of early April’s Fool joke? Why me? I guess no matter what you do to protect yourself—pulling out, getting tested, asking your partner’s status—there’s no way to prevent HIV. Say la vie.
To this day, I still don’t know whom infected me with HIV, but there’s no use crying over spilled milk, right? All I can do now is try to live my life positively—pun not intended—and share my tips with others like I always do. So, here are 3 ways you can still live a normal life even if you’ve tested positive for HIV.
1. Get on medication early. Apparently the thing that causes HIV to turn into AIDS is when White Blood Cells turn into AIDS Cells that attack your system. This doesn’t even make sense since blood is red and not white, but whatever. The thing that sucks is that HIV meds have crazy side effects and I look/feel like shit pretty much all day, every day. The upside to being on HIV meds with side effects though is that your doctors will perscribe you other meds to take care of the side effects from your HIV meds (if you have health insurance, which I do because I’m still on my parents’ plan), so you’re pretty much covered. And don’t worry, if you miss a few doses of your meds because you were too fucked up from partying and forgot to go home, just take triple the dose (plus your side effects meds) whenever you get home, and drink a lot of water!
2. Join an HIV support group. I’ve had some of the hottest, most raw sex of my life with the pig bottoms from my HIV support group.
3. Educate others. Hopefully me reaching out to you guys here has helped educate you as to the causes and the effects of HIV. In addition to my role here, I’ve also been doing some behind the scenes work over at Broke Straight Boys, where I’m advising the models and the production crew on HIV testing protocols and safe sex guidelines. What can I say? I’m just trying to do my part!
Thanks guys.
-Brandon
yeah, is this fake? he never mentions wearing a condom, and his instructions for missing (SKIPPING??) doses are scary…?
thumbs up! made me smile. welcome to the team, brandon. as a rookie, it is your duty to go out and evangelize, spread the good word, recruit, convert.
Why you ask why you are HIV+? You answered it yourself. You had multiple partners, practiced Bare Backing, and DID NOT USE CONDOMS. You are young and so many of your age group are not getting the message about Safer Sex, also having fun without the holes. It is a shame that your mentors and friends did not help you understand Condoms and how they work and don’t work. But that is a problem now with the Bare Backing community. They talk about the “feeling”, but do not mention CONDOM usage. Condoms prevent not only HIV/AIDS, but Syphilis, Gonorrhea , Hep A, and Hep C, Genital herpes, HPV, Trichomoniasis, Chlamydia, If you have an STD caused by bacteria or parasites, your health care provider can treat it with antibiotics or other medicines. If you have an STD caused by a virus, there is no cure. Sometimes medicines can keep the disease under control. Correct usage of latex condoms greatly reduces, but does not completely eliminate, the risk of catching or spreading STDs. Communication is the key to a relationship.
2.I’ve had some of the hottest, most raw sex of my life with the pig bottoms from my HIV support group.
you should be ashamed of yourself for posting this, in whatever sense it was
Jesus fucking christ. Are you people illiterate? If this post was any more obviously satirical, it would have a giant bright label screaming SATIRE NOT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY. It’s like people have zero common sense nowadays.
We KNOW it’s satire.
Irresponsible, unfunny, wrong satire!
HIV is not a joke!
So my Furby Vodoo Doll with matching backpack worked after all. Ha-ha!
Yeah, HIV is, like, kind of a bummer but, you know, that bareback sex WAS really like so hot and, as I wrote, like, Say La Vee.
Why don’t you choose a new intern? This one seems close to his expiration date.
Is this a parody?
”A lot of you might be wondering how in the world someone like me could possibly catch HIV, and believe me, I’ve been wondering pretty much the same thing these past few weeks. I always practiced safe sex by asking my partners if they were clean and disease free before we fucked bareback so this whole thing has left me pretty perplexed. Why me?” — well, that’s the biggest loudest longest laugh i’ve had in WEEKS.
this has got to be a joke, yes?
He is not real people!
Apparently, only the hateful cunts on here understood that this post was a joke. As were the other posts by ‘Brandon’. Clearly those of you that aren’t cunts, just fucking retarded, did not get the joke – as unfunny as it was. The basic 1,2,3s of the post, minus the exposition, are completely valid. But if a porn blog is where you’re getting your sex health news, god help you.
Also two people with HIV shouldn’t be barebacking because they can have two separate strands of the virus and pass it on to each other, it was irresponsible to say, that you’ve had raw sex with the pig bottoms in your HIV group. Even if this is a joke, it’s wrong to say such things.
Agreed. HIV isn’t a joke.
Even if this isn’t real, I think it’s nice and healthy way to keep the discussion alive within our peeps. I think there’s a good message behind this story. It’s casual, controversial, and funny. The 3 main goals not bad advice: 1. Get on the meds. 2. join a support group. and 3 educate others. That totally works for me. As for the stock photo, the guy’s hot. Who cares if it’s not real. Jeeez…
Regardless of whether this is a hoax or not, someone may take it seriously. It is an irresponsible post either way, and the correct and valid information probably should be given as a disclaimer if this is in fact 100% a true account.
But I call highly irresponsible, unfunny bullshit.
Totally agree. This ‘feature’ should be dropped. It’s a waste of space.
“Apparently the thing that causes HIV to turn into AIDS is when White Blood Cells turn into AIDS Cells that attack your system. This doesn’t even make sense since blood is red and not white, but whatever.”
Oh ya don’t say, Brandon!
No wonder you were stupid enough to get AIDS, you dumb bitch! You write like the leader of the special ed fraternity at a community college. I’m glad you got HIV. Here’s to hoping it will turn into AIDS soon, you filthy cunt.
Like I said, Zach, you’re evil. The misuse of “whom” I have to admit was a stroke of genius.
These is a lot of misuse in this article. “Brandon” needs help with spelling, French and grammar. Oh, and safe sex education.
We get it, there are ignorant people out there.
Whoops, *There* is a lot of misuse. Typo, not bad spelling or grammar :0)
Guys…do you really think Brandon is for real? Like the dude said on Twitter, I’m thinking this is a hoax. Zach got us all worked up last time. Laid low. And now “Brandon” is back with HIV so we could all say “I told you so”. We’re being played.
” I always practiced safe sex by asking my partners if they were clean and disease free before we fucked bareback”
…that’s not safe sex.
No, its irony.
Fucking lol’d at #2
This is satire people it’s not real. But all jokes aside there’s a lot of bad advice in this article so it’s not to be taken serious.
Given the comments that we see to every “intern Brandon” post, I wonder if it might be prudent on Zach’s part to post some kind of disclaimer or something at the bottom indicating that the post is satire.
Long-time readers of the blog would immediately recognize Zach’s style and recognize the irony and satire. But for those who might chance upon it via Google or some such, I do hope they do not go away with erroneous ideas.
I found that final dig on the ignorance of BSB boys hit the nail on the head. But not everybody might know the full context to be able to understand the delicious irony in Zach’s blog posts.
Yes I see your point. Brandon hasn’t always been one of Zach’s obvious satirical personality. Those who don’t know this site will definitely not get it.
How did this happen?!! You knew your status!
HIV is so YESTERDAY. Blah, blah, blah.
Brandon is so dumb. He left out the most important detail that when you’re on HIV meds, you can’t spread the virus to others. Everyone should know this so when you have bareback sex with an HIV+ person all you have to do is ask them if they’re on meds and you won’t have to worry.
Really Michael? do you want to preach that? Yes, if your viral load is ‘undetectable’ it severely decreases your chances of transmission. However, asking someone if they’re on meds, they say yes, ok – blow your load in my ass! I’m safe! I don’t think so!
He could have started meds yesterday…?
The meds could not be working yet?
He had a hard weekend of partying and forgot a pill or two and now he slipped from his ‘undetectable’ status.
JUST WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM!!!
Is 10 minutes of “I hate condoms, ohhh it feels so good without one” really worth a lifetime of expensive meds, doctor visits, dating issues, insurance issues…? I don’t think so.
“all you have to do is ask them if they’re on meds and you won’t have to worry.”
Yeah, right, because they’ll ALWAYS be telling the truth!
Exactly. Just like the guys who are always truthful when they say they’re HIV-negative.
The writer of this article deserves what he has coming to him.
Heh. :D
Zach’s post was satirical and sarcastic but it still offers sound advice. You, on the other hand, should not be spreading bullshit.
hey brandon, i recently tested positive as well and for me has been truly difficult to deal with. i guess its never easy and a lot of the same questions mentioned i asked myself. i still do. so thanks for your honesty. and advice.
Here is a GREAT website!!!
http://www.positivelyaware.com/2012/12_01/hiv_wellness_series.shtml
Also I think it is crucial to pay attention to diet and exercise…many of the medications have serious side effects if you are drinking and/or doing other drugs…it is important that you REALLY listen to and ASK your doctor important questions about your health…
I think it’s inevitable that some dumb “straight” kid from a studio like BSBBPD (Broke Straight Boys with Borderline Personality Disorder) is going to seroconvert on set and in a come to jeebus moment files a lawsuit which gets all sorts of unnecessary attention resulting in some local politician with nothing to do turning it into a “cause.” Meanwhile, gays get called dirty, disease riddled whores and while that’s usually something I’d be proud of, I’d rather not have that label ascribed to me…
The poor guy in that stock photo.
AMEN !
Was this supposed to be a serious article? I am getting a parody/satire vibe but with the kids today..you can never be sure. This fiddle-dee-dee I have HIV attitude has taken me aback. But I am well aware that lots of the young’uns today think they aren’t really gay until they seroconvert. Also loved the part where his parents’ medical coverage takes care of it..UNTIL he is 26. I wonder how “Scarlett” he will be then?
Oh Brandon…tsk tsk tsk!
Dude, I feel bad for you, but you posted how you only have bareback sex. Still happy with that choice?
AIDS at 19, what an accomplishment.
Probably pissed off some poz guy with your clean comment.
Probably some ugly old black meth-addict because according to his him that’s the type of people who get AIDS.