Sexy Summer Q&A: A First Time Bottom’s Dilemma!

[Editor’s Note: Below is another installment of The Sword’s new “Sexy Summer Q&A,” in which The Sword takes questions from porn stars, fans, industry professionals, and anyone else who emails us! Got a question that only a true gay porn insider could answer? Feel free to email us using the above “tips” link.]

Today’s question comes from a gay porn star who is worried about bottoming for the first time!

Q: Dear The Sword,

I’m a gay porn superstar and I’m having a problem, but I want to stay anonymous. I’ve been in the gay porn industry as a gay porn actor for about 15 years now. In the past, people thought I was hot, so I could get away with not really having to perform with fags; I would sit back, relax, and model for the camera while they suckled on my peepee.

Unfortunately for me, the gay porn industry has changed a lot since the 1950’s when I first started, and I can no longer get away with just letting guys suck my penis. I really like trannies, but I can’t do anything with them on camera! I’ve tried to combat my decline in popularity by pretending to have full-on homosexual butt sex, and people really believed it! Unfortunately, there have been a few little liars and drama starters (pssh, gay guys, amirite?) who have been telling people that I faked the whole thing!

I really want to take things to the next level. I have a new house, multiple girlfriends, a shoe addiction, a kid, a new car, and a strip club opening soon that I have to finance, and I can’t afford to lose any more money! I want to have full-on gay butt sex with a gay man (or men) on camera, but I’ve never bottomed before on film! (Naturally, I’ll have to bottom, since I won’t be able to get hard enough to be the top, and plus I can’t fuck a homo man in the ass because I don’t want an STD or anything, and that’s how you get ’em.) Oh and BTW sometimes I’ll let a tranny fuck me in the sphincter, but they always have really small ones so that doesn’t count (plus I only let them do it on his/her birthday).

So, do you have any tips for a first time on-camera gay bottom? I really need your help.

Sincerely,
Anally Anxious

A: Dear Anally Anxious,

First of all, congratulations on pushing your own personal limits! It’s important to remain challenged in our professional lives, so you’re already on the right track by just thinking about trying something new. In terms of getting down to the nitty gritty of bottoming, that’s a tough one. The Sword is strictly a top and has never bottomed before, so unfortunately we can’t give you any empirical advice. There are, however, a few well-known tips we’re happy to pass along:

1. Start small! You’ve already been with baby-dicked trannies, so you’re well on your way. Try anally pleasuring yourself with tiny objects to “warm up” for the big day. A finger, your partner’s tongue, a lollipop, or a fragile and delicately hand-blown glass bottle would be perfect for somebody like you.

2. Don’t forget to douche! First, find any sort of rubber tubing lying around the house or the garage (an old deflated bike tire that’s been cut open would work) and securely attach one end of it to the bathtub faucet. Make sure it’s on there tight! Then, get into the bathtub, get on all fours, and place the other end of the rubber tubing gently into your anus. (If you only have a shower and no bathtub faucet, you can attach the rubber tubing to the shower head so long as it’s long enough to stretch from the shower head to your asshole.) Proceed to slowly feed the rubbing tubing further and further inside of your anus until at least 7 or 8 inches worth is firmly up there. Then, simply turn the bathtub faucet to the full “on” position, and voila! Stay in that position for roughly 15 minutes, letting the cool jet stream (cold water is preferable as it kills more of the bacteria and feces—never use hot or luke warm water!) circulate and swirl deep within you, and then—and this part is important—very quickly rip the rubber tubing out of your anus as fast as you can. The slower you go at pulling out, the more uncomfortable it can be. Discard rubber tubing.

3. Finally—and this isn’t really a bottoming tip so much as it is a “life tip”—is there possibly a mentor or an elder in your life, like, say, the owner or president of the gay porn company for which you work, whom you could go to for some “special training”? I don’t mean to sound untoward, but if you keep the boss “happy” by offering to let him or her privately “explore” who you are as a performer on a regular basis and behind closed doors, perhaps your job will be secure without ever having to bottom (on-camera) after all? Just a thought!