Our own comprehensive research studied the relationship of self-described tops to self-described bottoms. We discovered that more gays like to bottom than top in most cities, especially in “King of Bottoms” Mason Wyler’s hometown of Houston.

Manhunt, who unlike us took versatility into account, did not include online cruisers who checked the “Ask me” box for sexual position. Just like we assume that many dudes who check “Ask me” for their HIV status are positive, we have to assume that many dudes who check “Ask me” for sexual position are sheepish bottoms. Anyway, apparently we’re all tops — and VGL and masc too, we’re guessing.

But according to Trevor Hoppe, the earnest academifaggot behind The Bottom Monologues, our own study failed as well. He refutes our methodology and comes to some conclusions of his own. In response, we can only say that Trevor has an ugly haircut. 

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The United States According to MANHUNT (Manhunt Daily)