“Joe the Plumber” (Joe Wurzelbacher of Toledo, Ohio) emerged as a symbol for struggling American business owners, heating up the candidates’ arguments over who would better snake the drain of an economy in the toilet.

Maybe it’s that we both have feces on our hands, but the thought of Joe’s got us hungry and our pipes heated up. Turns out, you you can always find a good plunger on Craigslist. But with a little elbow grease, it’s not hard to find someone to drain you. (Or, evidently, to make two paragraphs worth of bad sex puns.)

Not quite the Snap-On Pin Up girls of old, but certainly better than Larry the Cable Guy.

Falcon dick-throb Chase Hunter cornered the market on toolbelt-slinging megahunks with his legendary Basic Plumbing trilogy, even coming out of retirement to polish off Roman Heart’s pipes.

James Denton seared his abs into the bathtime fantasies of bored housewives across America when he sweated his way from Teri Hatcher’s sink to her skivvies on Desperate Housewives. In the time-honored soap opera cougar scenario played out here, hot plumbers have popped up everywhere from All My Children to Melrose Place to cause a stir.

In January 2007, AP ran an article declaring plumbers as the world’s most newly sexy occupation, citing a “meteoric” rise to number 14 on some list. This guy up here is apparently Polish and famous for being the Fabio of drainage. Maybe porn stars do have career options after the industry spits them out!

WTF? LOL!!!!

Insert your “laying pipe” joke here.

We couldn’t discuss hot plumbers without Mario and Luigi! That would be sacrilege. Although our two favorite mustached plumber heroes are supposed to be “brothers”, you have to admit they’re kind of homoerotic. Mario is clearly the bear daddy top, and Luigi is his total butt boy. Outed!

Yes, we realize that on Who’s The Boss he was an overall handyman and not a plumber per se, so sue us.

RELATED:

Election 2008: Our Endorsements
2009 FDNY Calendar Features Less Punim, More Pecs
Sarah Palin: Drag Icon