Hey everyone! Today I’m happy to bring you my review of a new scene on ActiveDuty.com, starring hunky Marines Guy and Tanner. Guy is the one on the left with the tattoos who made all the french fries covered in snow, but I couldn’t get them out of the gondola in time!
There we were, rowing and rowing and rowing, trying to make it back to Dink Flamingo’s house to watch Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem at Sea World. Can’t believe she did pot!! So did I though, and everyone’s gonna find out when I set the clock to say 3:30 p.m. I’m falling, and Tanner’s cock is soft. Why so many soft cocks? Soft cocks, socks cocks. Grey socks, black socks, white socks. Cocks are like socks, and balls are shoes.
A coloring book with porcupines and Whitney Houston, who is helping me draw. She hands me the crayons and says, “Show me the money!!!” I am filling in the coloring book with the colors she gives me, but all the crayons are leaking horse’s acid, and I’m eating the acid and the crayons, and I hate doing acid crayons. Whitney and me, on acid, decide to ride the horse who gave us the acid crayons.
Tanner and Guy stay in the same position and fuck on the bed, but it’s almost 3:30 p.m. and how many rooms can there be here? In one room is the clock (I will set it for 3:30 p.m. if it’s on the Indian reservation time with my granddaughter who died), and in the other room is the snow capped mountains. Now the horse, Whitney, me, my granddaughter’s ghost, and Dink Flamingo missed the train to Sea World. No one will forgive me as the train’s wings cry. Whitney and Dink, screaming at me to “keep it cute or put it on mute, fuckface blogger,” so I take them to Red Lobster.
Dink Flamingo and Whitney Houston and me have Shrimp Fest at Red Lobster, which is Olive Garden. Guy ejaculates on Tanner’s chest in the middle of the restaurant, but you can’t cum inside of a fax machine when there isn’t any water! No one knows which booth she’s hiding in, but I will find my granddaughter. Tanner cums on Whitney Houston’s grave and has unlimited soup and salad, the end.
This is what happens when you let rednecks like Dink Flamingo make porn. I haven’t watched AD in years—does Dink still have that annoying & insulting commentary? I was always a bit put off by how when he was filming scenes,he’d talk about the bottoms to the tops like they were objects and not really people.
no no ..KADEN is the most boring porn star ever ..
Tanner is THE most boring porn star ever.
This blog is getting boring……… ZZZZZZZ….
Yeah, this is kind of why I stopped buying their DVD’s or renewed my membership. It just seemed like a let down each time a new scene was released. Even that neanderthal Cash had more expression and energy. I hope they get their groove back soon, I miss old AD. All those shaved pubes and limpness just makes me of think baby dick, and that ain’t sexy!
I fell asleep, and dreamed that the Active Duty models had pubic hair.
I fell asleep reading this blog.
Tanner is ugly/hot but, one boring fuck. Dink needs to put him with a top that can keep his cock hard maybe that would put some life in him.
OMG! I can not stop laughing. This is the funniest thing EVAH!! Read it to me again read it to me again read it to me again!
Vintage Active Duty is like cocaine. New Active Duty, (last 2+ years) is better than Ambien.
Hmm…Now that I look at it, That guy, Guy, has some color on his forearms. Damn, that must piss him off! Or Maybe he has been fisting Dink and didn’t wash good enough.
Active Duty is so 200 and Late!!!! Tired ass racist porn factory. It’s summer and that guy, Guy hasn’t been in the sun at all. Tanner has a little bit of color. Hmmm, I wonder is he and Axl belong to the same group that likes everything to be white. You know that group, they only eat white cake. Ya know the one….
Hey ya’ll …. it’s nice that they give those boys bottled water to keep them hydrated during those hard pounding, energetic sex scenes. Low blood pressure is soooo not hot. Especially for the viewer !
I had a root canal that was less painful than watching this!
I will always love you, Zach. CRACK IS WHACK !!! Your review/dream sounds much more interesting than that scene ! Thanks for ordering the extra cheesy garlic biscuits at the Red Lobster. Bobbi Kristina and Clive Davis are sad that you didn’t mention how they sang happy birthday to Guy while Tanner was cumming on his cheat. Last time I saw your granddaughter, she was on ‘Dancing With The Stars’ with Mick Lovell and they were both kicking Bristol Palin’s ass. I hope you find her soon. She owes me money.
Have Dirk Flamingo gone too far? :)
It must have been the horse’s acid. That’s way too fucked up for it to have been the pot.
OMG, I had a crazy ass dream last night too! I already forgot it though. Don’t you just hate when that happens?
Ooh, they’ve got the pussy porn playing for them on both a TV and a MacBook…
Lemme guess… Guy likes lezbo porn and Tanner’s more into spitting/slapping/rape-y stuff.