According to the criminal complaint filed with the Wood County police
department, Edward Lanphear  offered the first man a ride home, then
pretended he was a police officer and knocked him unconscious; the
second was abducted by Lanphear after he tried to sleep off his drunk
in his truck. While we normally wouldn’t advocate drinking and driving,
we recommend young men who don’t want to be penetrated anally and
hidden in a garage to get the hell out of Wood County or forgo the
green beer. Unless, of course, you’re Mason Wyler.

RELATED:
Such A Nice Man: Jeffrey Dahmer

Abducted Wisconsin Man Lucky To Be Alive (356gay.com)
State of Wisconsin vs. Edward Lanphear (WSAW.com)