When In Ancient Rome, Skull-Fuck a Faggot

If they had rape porn dialogue in Ancient Rome, it would probably resemble this fun little poem written by Catullus (ca. 84 BC – ca. 54 BC):

I’m gonna fuck you guys up the ass and shove my cock down your throats,
yes, you, Aurelius—you fucking cocksucker—and you too, Furius, you faggot!
Just because my verses are tender doesn’t mean
that I’ve gone all soft. Sure, a poet should focus
on writing poetry and not on sex; but does that
mean they can’t write about sex? If a poem is
in good taste, well-written and erotic,
it can give massive boners to hairy old men,
not just to horny teenagers. You think I’m a sissy
just because I write about thousands of kisses?
I’m gonna fuck you guys up the ass and shove my cock down your throats!

The poem’s Wikipedia entry explains that Latin had a colorful and exacting vocabulary for obscene sex acts, such as “irrumare,” a transitive verb that means “to insert one’s penis into another’s mouth for suckling.” The entry goes on to explain:

In explicit modern English, the pun suggests that “just because my verses are little and soft, doesn’t mean that I’m the same, that I’m some hussy cock-sucker who can’t get it up” … On the contrary, says Catullus, although my verses are soft …, they can arouse even limp old men. Should Furius and Aurelius have any remaining doubts about Catullus’ virility, he offers to fuck them anally and orally to prove otherwise.

Here’s the full poem in Latin:

Pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo,
Aureli pathice et cinaede Furi,
qui me ex versiculis meis putastis,
quod sunt molliculi, parum pudicum.
Nam castum esse decet pium poetam
ipsum, versiculos nihil necessest(necesse est);
qui tum denique habent salem ac leporem,
si sunt molliculi ac parum pudici
et quod pruriat incitare possunt,
non dico pueris, sed his pilosis
qui duros nequeunt movere lumbos.
Vos, quod milia multa basiorum
legistis, male me marem putatis?
Pedicabo ego vos et irrumabo.

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“I will bugger you…”
(Reddit)


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No Responses to “When In Ancient Rome, Skull-Fuck a Faggot”

  1. Gavin says:

    That poem is just the tip of the ice berg when it comes to latin poetry with homosexual themes, whether erotic or taunting.

    This poet’s attitude is typical of a normal, heterosexually oriented Roman man. It’s using the idea of fucking other men as a threat and a form of taunting. Romans found nothing shameful or unmanly about males fucking other men for fun in addition to women; only that taking the bottom or cocksucking position was degrading and effeminate.

    American culture thinks topping is just as degrading and effeminate as bottoming. We also heap on sinful, mentally ill and unnatural.

    But the Romans didn’t! They made emperors out of fags (Hadrian) and gods, too! (Antinous)

  2. obidient4u says:

    OMG..I’m a white faggot and I need a straight or dominant top in Waynesboro, Va area to be my Catullus..To fuck me up the ass and shove your cock down my throat..Your cocksucking faggot..alongneckturtle@gmail dot com..

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