We’re Too Poor To Fuck The 3rd Annual Escort Awards

Dudes like that hottie who stole our wallet and left while we were frantically douching in the next room give escorts a bad name. But the presenters point out that these guys are “courageous and skilled men” who “provide an invaluable service.”

Hear, hear. Frantic douching aside, these boys put up with a lot of shit. Our man-on-the-ground Nick Capra recently dished to a tabloid that one of his closeted clients began to sing “Onward Christian Soldiers” during sex.

Rentboy.com throws the awards, some bitch named Shequida will host, and “celebrities” like La Curiousity, Mr. Jason Curious, will present. Nominees include several porn stars: fur-ball stud Arpad Miklos and hulky hunk Diesel Washington are up for several awards each, industry obsession Francois Sagat is up for best ass, freshly shorn Zeb Atlas is up for Best Porn Star Escort, and gay-for-pay mascot Pat Bateman is nominated for Best Newcomer. Those two ambitious Brits are up for an award, too.

Full list of nominees, which you can vote for through next week, are available on the Rentboy website.

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We Care About the Hard Choice Awards

Vote (The Hookies 2009, via XBiz)


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