Weekend Event Roundup: Feb 29 – Mar 2
Friday
Fag Fridays @ Pink
2925 16th Street
10PM
This is it, kids. The last Fag Friday. Maybe not, like, ever, but this is the last weekly party DJs David Harness, Manny Ward, Neon Leon and Rolo are going to be doing under the “Fag Fridays” brand. …read more
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Charlie Horse @ The Cinch
1723 Polk Street (bet. Clay & Washington)
10 PM, show at midnight
It’s
a hike if you don’t live in the Russian Hill/Nob Hill/’Loin vicinity,
but it beat out Trannyshack last year for best drag show, and it’s at a
bar that is sort of country-western themed but also has a ceiling
covered in colored in those multicolored Mexican paper flags.
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Saturday
Frisco Disco @ The Transfer
198 Church Street
9PM – 2AM
DJ’s Richie Panic and Jeffrey Paradise spin their
eclectic-electro-punk-dancey best at this weekly hipster haven where
you’re just as likely to make out with a gay boy wearing a kaffiyeh as
you are to get elbowed by a baby-dyke with lipstick smeared all over
her face. …read more
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Trans Am @ Club 8
1151 Folsom Street
10PM – 2AM
When you’re as tired of hearing remixes of “Rehab” as we are, you might
want to head to this monthly party at Club 8, where the music and the boys tend
more to the punk and rock end of the spectrum. …read more
Sunday
Hunky Jesus Contest @ The Eagle
398 12th Street
Every Sunday, 3PM to 7PM
Whatever you do, don’t wear flip-flops to this weekly $10 all-you-can-slug beer fest–your feet will get stepped on and covered in sand, and beer… and who knows what else. …read more
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Friday
Bloc Party @ Easternbloc
505 East 6th Street
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Star Fridays @ Star Lounge
Chelsea Hotel Basement
222 W 23rd Street
10PM – 4AM
back to Chelsea for some style and red velvet-and-chandelier-style glamour.
Nick Van Bremen and Matt Tratner host with DJ Lina and a V2 vodka open bar from 10 to 11. …read more
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Saturday
Cock Fight @ The Cock
29 2nd Avenue
10PM – 4AM
We love The Cock, except when they spray that
glow in the dark shit on everyone. The East Village was ahead of the
curve in bringing the dirtiness back to gay life in the late 90s …read more
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Ticklyn @ Sugarland
221 N. 9th Street (Williamsburg)
10PM – 4AM
Brooklyn: it’s where half the under-thirty gays live now anyway. DJ
Emjay spins deep house, etcetera for the Manhatts party monsters and
Billyburg homos alike. …read more
Glitz @ The Ritz
369 W 46th Street
11 PM
Flawless tranny Candis Cayne, who’s currently appearing as Stephen Baldwin’s scandalous squeeze on ABC’s Dirty Sexy Money, puts on a little song-and-dance for the Hell’s Kitchen crew at this new-ish Sunday party, along with hubby DJ Marco.
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It’s getting a little mobbed after midnight at this glam weekly fete, but given that Sundays are for drinking …read more
See more events in San Francisco and New York.
Answer Key: Match the Porn Star With His Baby Pic
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1.
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c.
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Roman Heart
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2.
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While he now prefers more exotic locales, it’s good to know he got his start at the mall.
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e.
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Collin O’Neal
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3.
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This one doesn’t really need a clue. The pout totally gives it away.
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f.
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Michael Lucas
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4.
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He is probably laughing to himself knowing that one day his biceps will be bigger than his whole body is now.
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b.
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Matthew Rush
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5.
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Who’d-a-thunk this runt would grow up to be a GRUNT?
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h.
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Steve Cruz |
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6.
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Despite the photo, this prolific twunk (that’s twink-turned-hunk, dear reader) has yet to play a cowboy (but he has played a park ranger).
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k.
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Jeremy Hall
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7.
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You might want to put your “thinking cap” on for this one.
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d.
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Francois Sagat |
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8.
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This is an appropriate pose given his tendency to pontificate.
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j.
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Spencer Quest |
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9.
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Though he’s currently a certain studio’s youngest exclusive, it’s hard to imagine him ever being this young.
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l.
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RJ Danvers
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10.
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So far, everyone around Sword HQ has been able to guess this one right off, so it’s probably too easy.
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a.
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Damien Crosse
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11.
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See below.
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g.
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12.
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See above.
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i.
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Aden Jaric |
Sidebar: Cliff’s Notes on The Bryan Kocis Murder
Barely being the key word for Cobra’s #1 star (and Kocis’ occasional lover) Brent Corrigan: Actually he wasn’t even close to legal when he filmed his first four movies for Cobra including the wildly successful Every Poolboy’s Dream.
At some point in 2005 something went sour between Corrigan and Kocis. Corrigan filed a report with the FBI stating he was underage when he worked for Cobra, and claiming that Kocis was aware of it. From here, things get really ugly (and complicated) between Kocis and Corrigan from here: The two sue and counter-sue each other for breach of contract and both laying claim to the name “Brent Corrigan.” The four Cobra movies featuring an underage Corrigan are pulled off the shelves and many in the gay adult industry fear larger repercussions.
(Click on license to enlarge.)
Corrigan stars in Velvet Mafia in September 2006, but Falcon bills him as “Fox Ryder” to avoid legal entanglements with Bryan Kocis. In December, both Corrigan and Kocis allude settling things between each other and hint that they’re going to start a company together. In January, 2007, Brent and his boyfriend Grant Roy (who is around the same age as Kocis) are seen at the AVN Expo in Vegas with Harlow Cuadra and Joseph Kerekes—two aspiring amateur porn producers who run an escort service out of their home in West Virginia. Cuadra/Kerekes want to collaborate with Corrigan on a movie, but has concerns about Kocis.
On January 20, Harlow purchased a background check on Kocis (paying with his Discover card). Credit card records would also show that over the next few days Harlow would rent an SUV, and buy a gun and knife in a pawnshop near their house in Virginia Beach and check into a motel near Kocis’ house. Four days later, on January 24, Kocis was stabbed to death and his house was set on fire. An SUV was seen leaving the house shortly before the fire broke out. The next day Cuadra returns the his SUV to the car rental—it has over 1,000 miles on it (a few hundred more than a round trip from their house in West Virginia to Kocis’ in Pennsylvania).
A week later, police recovered a picture on Kocis’ computer of a model he was supposed to meet at the time he was murdered. The model was identified a few days later as Cuadra, who claimed to have been with a client the night of the murder. In April, police electronically record a two meetings between Corrigan, Roy, Cuadra and Kerekes, where they talk about the murder. Three weeks later, Cuadra and Kerekes are arrested for the murder, where they currently still are on trial and could face the death penalty.
RELATED:
Bryan Kocis Timeline (El Mysterio)
Match The Porn Star With His Baby Pic
Rules: This is sort of like our MySpace music quiz… Match the baby on the left with his grown-up counterpart in the right. If you get them all right, your prize is bragging rights that you’re an even bigger porn freak than we are. We even gave you clues. Click here for answers.
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1.
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He may look a little darker these days (cool it with the tanning pills, soul brother!), but look at what a l’il sweetie this megastar once was, sitting there, *so over* that sailor suit he could just die.
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a.
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Damien Crosse
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2.
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While he now prefers more exotic locales, it’s good to know he got his start at the mall.
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b.
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Matthew Rush
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3.
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This one doesn’t really need a clue. The pout totally gives it away.
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c.
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Roman Heart
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4.
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He is probably laughing to himself knowing that one day his biceps will be bigger than his whole body is now.
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d.
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François Sagat
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5.
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Who’d-a-thunk this runt would grow up to be a GRUNT?
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e.
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Collin O’Neal |
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6.
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Despite the photo, this prolific twunk (that’s twink-turned-hunk, dear reader) has yet to play a cowboy (but he has played a park ranger).
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f.
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Michael Lucas
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7.
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You might want to put your “thinking cap” on for this one.
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g.
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Jordan Jaric
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8.
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This is an appropriate pose given his tendency to pontificate.
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h.
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Steve Cruz |
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9.
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Though he’s currently a certain studio’s youngest exclusive, it’s hard to imagine him ever being this young.
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i.
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Aden Jaric
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10.
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So far, everyone around Sword HQ has been able to guess this one right off, so it’s probably too easy.
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j.
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Spencer Quest
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11.
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See below.
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k.
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Jeremy Hall |
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12.
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See above.
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l.
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RJ Danvers |
RELATED:
Can You Match the Porn Star With Their Myspace Music?
Swinging Singles: Our Five Favorite Porn Star Musical Hits
Sydney Dispatch #2: Margaret Cho Announces Aussie ‘Fag Hag Summit’
Of course, across the ocean, Cher, Bette and Rita Rudner are converging in Vegas. Are we witnessing
some sort of syzygy or the formation of a gay NATO to block the machinations of fag hag army in the
opposite hemisphere? We’ll leave the musing up to you. We’re going back to
watching the Facts of Life Down Under on Youtube.
EARLIER:
When the Rainbow Is Not Enuf: A Dispatch from Sydney Mardi Gras
RELATED:
Sydney Dispatch #3: 5 Things American Gays Can Learn From Australian Gays
Bette Midler’s “The Showgirl Must Go On”
Casting Special: The Kocis Murder Movie
In the role of Brent Corrigan: Zac Efron/Daniel Radcliff
While the obvious choice for #1 gay porn twink Brent Corrigan would be #1 Hollywood twink Zac Efron (who would need to butch up a bit, tone down the make-up), if there’s problems with Disney not letting him do it, a viable alternative would be Daniel Radcliff (who wouldn’t have a problem with the required full-frontal nudity or man-on-man kissing).
(photos courtesy of Socialite’s Life, Brent Corrigan Inc., via Bryan Boy)
In the role of Bryan Kocis: Dennis Haskins
Kocis always reminded us of Mr. Belding from Saved by the Bell and having him attached to this project could help us nab a cameo by Screech. Plus Mr. Belding was a total perv.
In the role of Grant Roy: Philip Seymour Hoffman
Roy’s not as doughy or pasty as Hoffman, but what the cast needs is at least one serious actor who can provide the gravitas needed to get our film some Oscar nods. Hoffman can deliver gravitas in spades for the mysterious and laconic Roy.
In the role of Joe Kerekes: Woody Harrelson
34-year-old Kerekes used to escort along-side Harlow. He’s aging superfast. If this keeps up, we’ll have no problem with Woody Harrelson. A younger alternative would be Sloth from The Goonies.
In the role of Harlow Cuadra: Emile Hirsch, Orlando Bloom, or Eric Bana
This is a tough one. Emile does have menacing scruffy loner down pat, but is too short. Orlando seems to have the hair, but none of the edge. Neither has the body to pull it off, so depending on what our budget for a personal trailer is, we might want to just use Eric Bana.
In the role of Chris Steele: John Travolta
Former head of production for Falcon, Steele cast Corrigan in his opus Velvet Mafia, which had some strange parallels with the Kocis case. Travolta & Steele are both Scientologists, possibly.
RELATED:
Sidebar: Cliff’s Notes on the Bryan Kocis Murder
Jet Set Exclusive Arrested for Attempted Murder of Sweet Old Couple
Zac Efron May Or May Not Be Shirtless and Kissing Another Boy, But No Matter What, He’ll Always Be a Fag to Us
Crime and Punishment (Fleshbot)
Harlow Cuadra Arrested for Murder (GayPornBlog)
Velvet Mafia (NakedSword)
Jet Set Exclusive Aaron James: Serving Gay Porn to a Tween Near You
While we’re dismayed to see that the footage shot of a Tim and Roma Show didn’t make the cut (we always love catching Sister Roma’s glassy stare on the boob tube), there was footage of James at the Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas, reactions from his nearest and dearest who were unaware of his, er… profession, and behind-the-scenes footage of the breaking star on the set of his new Hollywood movie. That is, his new porn called Hollywood Sex Club.
This marks considerable exposure for Jet Set Men in the
mainstream media, and a welcome change from their more modest
mainstream exposure on local news channels in regard, of course, to
grandma-basher Nickolay Petrov. According to MTV’s Remote Control Blog,
the episode (also profiling some righteous hetero-porn sluts named
“Rebekah” and “Shawntelle”) will re-air Friday the 29th at 2am,
Saturday March 1st at 12am and 9pm, Sunday March 2nd at 2am, and Monday March 3rd at 1am!
Below, we give you the trailer of On Fire, in which Aaron recently starred.
RELATED:
Caleb Carter as “Ben” on MTV’s Parental Control
Big Brother’s ‘Crazy James’ Sane Enough to Make ‘Dirty’ Gay Porn
True Life | Show Cast, Episode Guides, Trailers, Aftershow & Previews (MTV.com)
EARLIER:
Porn Conventions Reach New Highs
Jet Set Exclusive Arrested for Attempted Murder of Sweet Old Couple
Soon They Will Be Dead: The William F. Buckley Jr. Memorial List of Conservatives We’re Still Waiting on to Die
But it’s at times like these that those of us proud heathens and pervs should breathe a small sigh of relief and thank our Higher Power that
eventually, no matter how loud or assholic or powerful they are in
life, everyone croaks. There was dancing on Castro Street the day Ronald Reagan kicked
it. Below, a list of other misguided individuals who also, praise Jesus, will not be
with us much longer.
Anita Bryant
Age: 68
We were just thinking of her recently, so we decided to look up how old she is-and wouldn’t you know it, she is getting up there! Good old Anita was the biggest pain in every gay’s ass in the 70s (aside from the rawness left after all that bareback fucking!), going on television and decrying the early achievements of the gay rights movement. A former Miss Oklahoma and singer of shitty early 60s pop music, she later became spokeswoman for the Florida Citrus Commission and in 1977 orchestrated the repeal of a local ordinance in Miami that prohibited discrimination based on sexual orientation -an ordinance which was not reinstated until 1998. She was quoted as saying, “If gays are granted rights, next we’ll have to give rights to prostitutes and to people who sleep with St. Bernards and to nail biters.” She later said she’d adopted a more “live and let live” view, however she’s recently been seen at campaign events for animal-sex-loving candidate Mike Huckabee, so it’s hard to imagine she’s changed. She is one of the most loathed figures amongst older homos, but her work against the nascent gay rights movement proved so unsuccessful that she is barely talked about anymore and twentysomething gays have never heard of her. Unfortunately, thanks to the embalming qualities of Florida air and all that orange juice, the bitch has probably got at least another decade in her, if not two. Expected death: 2020, give or take.
Dick Cheney
Age: 67
The Dark Overlord of our little empire republic, Vice President Richard B. Cheney has done and said plenty that most of you already know about. To recap: He spearheaded the effort to get us into the Iraq Quagmire, is a sometime hunting buddy of Antonin Scalia and has a gay daughter whom he doesn’t like to acknowledge. He served as White House Chief of Staff under Ford and Defense Secretary under the first Bush, and in between, as a Congressman from Wyoming, he voted against the Equal Rights Amendment (1983). He likes to quote the philosopher Hobbes (“the life of man [without civil authority is] poor, solitary, nasty, brutish, and short”) and has lined his pockets with war profits since before taking office. He has heart problems and probably eats a lot of steak, so we’re hoping his brutish life ends shortly. Expected death: 2012
Jesse Helms
Age: 86
As a five-term Republican Senator from North Carolina, Jesse Helms had a lot of time to do a lot of damage in the name of Christian morality. Largely inspired by his personal revulsion for the artwork of Andres Serrano (he of “Piss Christ” fame) and Robert Mapplethorpe, Helms led a campaign in the late 80s and early 90s to audit the artistic worth of recipients of National Endowment for the Arts grants. On the work of Mapplethorpe, Helms said, “If someone wants to write ugly nasty things on the men’s room wall, the taxpayers do not provide the crayon.” A proud Clinton-hater and vocal opponent of school integration and abortion, Helms is the kind of bigoted “straight-shooter” Southerner our current President modeled his own persona after. “This Senator is not a goody-goody two shoes,” Helms said in 1987. “I’ve lived a long time,
but every Christian ethic cries out for me to do something. I call a
spade a spade, a perverted human being a perverted human being.” Lately we hear he has multi-infarct dementia and is waiting to die in a nursing home. Ah well. Expected death: Any day now.
Fred Phelps Sr.
Age: 78
Though we’re loathe to give the man any more of the attention he so pathologically craves, we have to say he’s near the top of our list of Why-Won’t-You-Die-Alreadys. The head of the Westboro Baptist Church in Topeka Kansas, he’s a crackpot Calvinist and egomaniacal preacher of hate with a congregation that numbers somewhere between 70 and 100, most of whom are related to him. For years he’s been dragging his followers from pride parade to pride parade, holding up signs that say “God Hates Fags,” but he gained national fame largely from his appearance at the funeral of gay saint and assumed Romaine Patterson pal, Matthew Shepard. The wrong Reverend already looks like the spawn of the Crypt Keeper and Henry Kane from Poltergeist 3, and all that rage can’t be good for anyone’s health, but unfortunately he has a son and namesake who will probably take over wherever he leaves off. Anyway, he’ll be worm food any second. Expected death: 2009
Antonin Scalia
Age: 72
He’s the “strict originalist” the Bushies have modeled their Supreme Court nominees after, and his death is about the only way liberals have an eightball’s chance in LA of regaining a majority on the high court. (Because we like you, and we don’t want you to feel dumb, we’ll just explain here that “originalism” or “textualism” as Scalia defines it is basically the idea that we are supposed to interpret the Constitution exactly as the writers intended 200+ years ago before there were such things, for instance, as gays, computers, abortion, or freedom for black people.) He’s a Catholic and one of the most brilliantly single-minded people you’ll ever listen to, and despite his endearing reported kinship over opera and martinis with Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg, we’d really love it he bought the farm before she did. Sadly, we don’t think we’ll get our wish. Expected death: 2020
RELATED:
Anita Bryant Nailed With Pie ca. 1977
Gay Restroom Goblin Officially Brings Discredit On Senate
Boxcover of the Week: Damn Yankers (Jake Cruise Media)
At any rate, we can’t help but wonder if the disc includes a scene in
which one of Jake’s coverboys strips down in a baseball locker room and
slowly jerks it to “Whatever Lola Wants, Lola Gets”. If not, theater
queens will likely have the song on-hand to make their own soundtrack
for a quick J/O, just in time to sing along: “I always get / What I aim for / And your heart and soul / Is what I CAAAAAAAME for!”
Now recline yourself, resign yourself, you’re through.
CLICK FOR THE FULL BOXCOVER (totally NSFW)!
RELATED:
Jake Cruise Media’s Damn Yankers (NakedSword.com)
EARLIER:
Boxcover of the Week: Fag Wagon (Pumphouse Media);
Judge a Porn By Its Cover!
Project Runway Finale Looms Closer; Let the Ferocheness Begin
For the reunion show, Bravo put together a montage of clips of poor Kevin Christianson, the sole straight man in the cast, and how he managed (amazingly!) not to end up with a cock in his mouth while bunking with this bunch of homos.
This clip provides joy on so many fronts: not only is it from Episode 1 with the whole cast of characters is still fully intact, but we have the first evidence of batshit Elisa’s batshit craziness with her grass stained fabric and that raggedy ass train; we have Jillian’s monosyllabic fretting and Victorya muttering under her breath; there’s Christian doing his hair and generally loving himself; and there’s even Jack, pre-flying-monkey-nose, standing near-naked in front of a window around minute 1:50. Oh, where does the time go.
We neglected to include Michael Kors in our roundup of gay minstrels, but this moment of realness from the big lady—and by ‘realness’ we mean we believe he genuinely broke out into laughter—made us realize we’d take him over that stone-cold humorless bitch Nina Garcia any day.
In Christian’s uber-gay lingo: If it’s not a tranny mess, then it’s fucking fierce. We love the talented little Millennial and his cockatoo hairstyle (and so did the show’s fans, who voted him the Fan Favorite and handed him a check for $10,000) and we also love watching how fucking long it takes him to flat-iron and style that shit into its signature flawlessness every morning. As much as he’s kind of a prick and a virtual jukebox of fey exclamations, our money’s on him to win.
RELATED:
Cosmo, Girl? The New Gay Minstrelsy
Tim Gunn on Hillary Clinton’s Gender Crisis
Project Runway Guy Determined to Stay Relevant for Five More Minutes
Joan Rivers Still Wants the Last Word on Oscar Fashion, Settles for Last Gasp
Okay, okay: NOW we’re over it.
RELATED:
Joan & Melissa Rivers’ Oscar 2008 Red Carpet Rundown (StyleList)
Fashion Purgatory: Joan and Melissa Rivers Relegated to Podcasting Their Red Carpet Barbs (Defamer)
EARLIER:
What the End of the Writers’ Strike Means for the Fagosphere;
Gays Grateful for Brief Gay Moments During Gay Super Bowl
Worst in Gay Marketing: Air New Zealand’s Pink Flight to Sydney Mardi Gras
The first ever “Gay Flight,” courtesy Air New Zealand, took gay American sex tourists from San Francisco to Sydney for Mardi Gras yesterday, where they were encouraged “to show up at the airport ready to party.” For $1,000 ($5,500 for first class) what did they get?
-A “bawdy performance” by “official hostess” Kathy Griffin (and the chance to have your extreme gayness captured forever on her Bravo series, who will also be filming on the flight).
-Live performances by four drag queens no one has heard of: Miss Ribena, Miss Tess Tickle (GEDDIT!? BECAUSE SHE HAS BALLS?!), and Miss Venus Mantrapp.
-screenings of classic gay-themed films
-”Goodie bag” filled with (we’re guessing): Lube samples, Absolute vodka samples, coupon for two-month free subscription to Gay.com.
Basically for a grand you get all the things you would get for at the local video bar. We’ll wait for the made-for-Logo TV movie.
(Thanks to YouTube user “mkolodny” for recording his TV screen to bring us this clip.)
RELATED:
When the Rainbow is Not Enuf: A Dispatch from Sydney Mardi Gras
The Pink Flight (Air New Zealand)
Gayest Airline Flight Ever Takes Off (Towleroad)
When the Rainbow Is Not Enuf: A Dispatch from Sydney Mardi Gras
But first, a few recollections on why,
maybe, in a World Is Flat way, you may not need to leave your gay ghetto to experience everything the
Cher-friendly globe has to offer.
[Editor's note: Please be advised that our intrepid Editor-at-Large in Sydney
has only recently stepped off a plane and remains a little cross-eyed
and grumpy. We imagine he may be more cheerful tomorrow... or not!]
1. The Rainbow Flag
It flies high over the Castro, but did you know that
homosexuals have adopted it in a world-wide NAFTA-style agreement? Yes, it’s the
most banal and tacky symbol in the LGBTTQQF
community, but everyone’s embraced it as readily as embroidered denim. Why go
halfway around the world to experience the pleasure of over-poured drinks and the San Francisco-born multi-colored pinwheel when you can find it down the street at Faces or the Ramrod or wherever it is you go on a lonely Friday night?
2. Drag Queens
Yes, Australian women are manly-manlier even than the straight actors in Priscilla Queen of the Desert-but is it any
excuse to subsitute a c-cup for an actual man? Of all the things that
the US has exported, ugly women-dressed-as-men are the easiest to replicate, but the comedy stylings of actual woman and faux queen “Jackie Loeb” (Barbra Streisand
impersonations, out-dated ditties involving Alanis Morrisette) at a delegation dinner last night, could be just as easily
experienced in Peoria-and by someone with an actual penis to boot! Bring back
Heklina-oh, wait… she’s on this same damned tour with us.
3. (Un-)Funny
T-Shirts
Have you heard of “Dick’s Erection” construction company? Are you
mesmerized by someone wearing a t-shirt begging you to “Do Me?” Australia may be
the place for you, but so might Key West, San Diego, Cheyenne or Fremont. The
internet means that everyone can have the same unfunny t-shirts wherever you go-Dubai, Davos or Duquesne. Yes, we know you’re gay, faggot! We are
still underwhelmed.
4. Dance Music
Decrying dance music in the country where the patron saint is Kylie Minogue might seem like protesting body hair a bear convention, but we’re walking around and we can’t. get. away from it! Just as gay culture worldwide seems to sup at the same Madge-Brit-Babs trough, Europe’s gay DJs are our gay DJs are the DJs down under. And with Kathy Griffin, Margaret Cho and Cyndi Lauper hopping from Pride to Pride to Pride, is the gay circuit any different than the old Borsht Belt?
5. Alcoholics
The saddest fact of gay life is that the
further you go from an urban center, the more likely some unhappy homosexual
with Cosmo breath is going to tell you you’re lovely and then get angry when you refuse to blow him in the bathroom. Just remember: He’s going to go home drunk and unhappy no matter what,
and so are you-but at least you won’t have chlymydia in your throat. Oh wait-we do.
Check back tomorrow for another dispatch from Gay & Lesbian Mardi Gras in Sydney, in which our Editor-at-Large insults some Heath Ledger fans and gets beaten up by a drag queen (…or not!).
RELATED:
Homos Won’t Get Groove Back in Jamaica, Might Get Killed
Mardi Gras Film Festival
