Old fags used to complain that Stonewall ruined everything. That the world before liberation-with its elaborate codes and secret clubs and knowing looks was somehow more refined, more civilized than the garish world of flag-waving bottle-throwing queens who came after. While we can't agree totally, we've got a soft spot for those pre-Philadelphia, pre-Will & Grace, pre-indie-film days when gay characters weren't so much closeted as, well, couched. Remember when Wayland Smithers was merely a knowing wink and not a cartoon Jodie Dallas? Or when Ellen was forced to talk in double entrendes? It's too easy to be obvious, that's why we sometimes long for them to bring back the Hollywood Production Code, and why we're taking a look at Our Favorite Closeted Gay Characters of All-Time.
Sebastian Venable Suddenly Last Summer, 1959
Bio: Sebastian never makes an actual appearance in Suddenly, Last Summer-adapted from the play by big gay Tennesee Williams-but, like a good fag, the whole thing revolves around him anyway. (We're at our most appealing when we're being cold and distant.) He was a poet and gardener worshipped by his mother who, when the film begins, is enlisting a lobotomist (Montgomery Clift) to silence his fag hag for trying to out him posthumously.
Gay Signifiers: Sebastina was a poet whose best friends were his mother and cousin Elizabeth Taylor. He built a whole garden full of carnivorous plants and succulants in a "Garden of Eden" motif. And he dressed in white linen. Unless you're Barry Diller, it doesn't get much gayer.
Gay-ish Quotes: Well, his character's dead, so we only here from him through his mother (Katherine Hepburn) and his hag (Elizabeth Taylor). But he was prone to over-dramatic statements and Taylor quotes him as saying, in reference to boys on the beach "That one's appetizin' " and "That one's NOT appetizin'." Even though you never see him, you just know he had an ascot, drank gin and masturbated to Gide.
Sisters in Crime: Peter Lorre in The Maltese Falcon, Andy Warhol, Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct
Was He Handsome? Unclear. He was getting older before he was beaten to death by a crowd of poor Spaniards, so we're imagining a forty-something George Hamilton. Then again, he had to use his mother and Liz to attract men, so maybe it was more like a forty-something Barry Diller.
Would We Have Fucked Him? Is the Pope Catholic? He was rich, snotty and wore white linen on trips to Southern Europe. Even if the hateful queen wasn't handsome, he'd at least be clean. Plus we're pretty sure he'd hire us escorts when we he was too drunk to get it up (frequently, we suspect). Would we be able to listen to his endless poetic musings? Probably not, but we'd gladly ditch him to hang out with Elizabeth Taylor.
Montgomery Clift interrogates an "Insane" Elizabeth Taylor about Sebastian's last days:
Don't Liz and Kate Hepburn describe him as being impossibly beautiful? Or was that just my fevered imagination? I always pictured him as looking like Monty Clift pre car crash (he's also in the movie, of course).
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Old fags used to complain that Stonewall ruined everything. That the world before liberation-with its elaborate codes and secret clubs and knowing looks was somehow more refined, more civilized than the garish world of flag-waving bottle-throwing queens who came after. While we can't agree totally, we've got a soft spot for those pre-Philadelphia, pre-Will & Grace, pre-indie-film days when gay characters weren't so much closeted as, well, couched. Remember when Wayland Smithers was merely a knowing wink and not a cartoon Jodie Dallas? Or when Ellen was forced to talk in double entrendes? It's too easy to be obvious, that's why we sometimes long for them to bring back the Hollywood Production Code, and why we're taking a look at Our Favorite Closeted Gay Characters of All-Time.
Bio: Sebastian never makes an actual appearance in 
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