[NSFW] ‘How To Suck Your Own Dick’
The hung geekster porn star Jeremy Feist can suck his own dick. You can’t, but that’s ok. Grab the nearest bottle of alcohol and follow him through his handy step-by-step guide. (He’s only missing one step, which is to run your industrial vodka through with a Brita filter beforehand.)
Step 1: Drink Up
…The booze will probably take some of the initial discomfort out of the equation…
Step 2: Limber Up
You want to focus on two areas here: The abs and the lower back…
Step 3: Drink Some More
Step 4: Get Hard
Step 5: Assume the Position
…if you want to make this easier on yourself, the legs-over-head position work best. The added gravity will help get your dick closer to your mouth, which is a huge help. Simply lie on your back and swing your legs over your head. Also, be sure to grab your dick at the base. It’ll keep the blood in your erection while still allowing you to maneuver and pull your dick as needed…
Step 6: ???
Step 7: Profit!
Step 8: Drink Some More
Self-Sucking 101… (Notes on Bar Napkins)