Get Off Taylor Lautner’s Cock Right Now, Taylor Swift, You Little Fucking Bitch

The latest issue of US Weekly reports that Taylor Lautner flew 2,000 miles to see two of Taylor Swift’s concerts annd “hang out with her mom.” A witness says that “they were hand in hand the whole night” at a party.

While I respect Lautner’s right to date whomever he wants, I’d urge him not to make any big decisions until he’s experienced, just once, getting fucked on a St. Andrews cross with one of Samuel Colt’s regurgitated condoms while another leather daddy squats in front of him to alternately spit in his mouth and shove a piss-soaked jock-strap down his throat.

Anyway, here’s the US recap of Taylor Swift’s evil machinations.

I reached out to Ms. Swift for comment via twitter, but she has yet to respond. I’ll keep you posted.

RELATED:

These Taylor Lautner Shirtless Pics Make Me Want To Get All Statutory
Don’t Look Up Taylor Lautner’s Birthday Until After You Masturbate To His New Shirtless Photos
Shut Up, Taylor Lautner, And Take Off Your Clothes And Show Us Your Cock


0 thoughts on “Get Off Taylor Lautner’s Cock Right Now, Taylor Swift, You Little Fucking Bitch”

  1. Paul, since you crush on Taylor Lautner so much, I thought you should see this video of him flaming out about the “really sexy guy” that he would “tap.”

  2. Mr Lautner is like the perferrable swing door. He’ll swing which ever direction will give his ass the very most attention and affection. Stay tuned on this one. When he turns 18, watch out!! There is a lot more to this one than anybody can imagine!! NJMJr!

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