Gay Porn Tips: How To Get A Gay Porn Star To Notice You

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Hello and welcome to the fourth installment of The Sword’s new series, Gay Porn Tips! While previous articles have featured tips for gay porn stars, today we’re focusing solely on gay porn stars’ fans!

Is there a certain gay porn star you’d like to become friends with, but you just aren’t sure how to get his attention? Are you too shy to take that first step and let him know how much of a fan you really are? Just what do you, the gay porn fan, have to do in order to get a gay porn star to notice you? Allow me to share a few simple tips that will help get your favorite gay porn star to notice you, and maybe, just maybe, even become your friend!

Leave a nice comment about them on a blog.
One of the easiest and most supportive ways to show a gay porn star how much you care about them is to say something nice about them on a blog—especially if your favorite gay porn star is receiving less than favorable feedback from other commenters. A blog’s comments section can be a pretty crazy place if you’ve never been in one before, but go ahead and dive in and say something positive! After all, it’s the internet, which means free speech. Once your gay porn star sees that you’ve defended him in the comments, he’ll more than likely respond to you personally and thank you for your support. From there, your budding friendship can really take off!
 

Start your very own blog dedicated to your favorite gay porn star.
If you’ve already left a nice comment about him on a blog, why not go ahead and start your own blog about him?! All you have to do is sign up for an account on Blogger or, even easier, Tumblr and start posting pictures of him, and you’re all done. Once your gay porn star sees all the hard work, time, and dedication you’ve put into taking photos from other websites and then posting them on to your website along with the copied and pasted text from the studio that took the pictures, he’ll know that you’re the real deal. And don’t be embarrassed if you can’t spell, read, or write in complete sentences—neither can gay porn stars! Trust me, you’re a blogger, not a “writer,” and if there’s one thing gay porn stars love more than themselves, it’s bloggers!
 

Favorite, RT, and respond to every single one of their tweets.
Once you’ve started a blog, you’ll want to get the word out to other fans of your gay porn star (although make no mistake—you are the #1 fan; after all, you started a blog) and to your gay porn star himself. Once you’ve started following him on Twitter, be sure to @ reply him and ask (politely) for him to follow you back. Then, once he’s following you (or even if he’s not), simply @ reply him with the link every single time you post one of his pictures to your Tumblr. That way, he can see all the hard work you’re doing, and if he’s not too busy shooting a movie or going to the gym or the grocery store or jail, he can RT your tweet, letting all of his followers know about you and your blog! Kick things up a notch by RT’ing his RT of your tweet, and be sure to “favorite” his tweets every time he posts a picture of himself in a bathroom mirror or an airplane or a tanning bed. Then, go ahead and take those pics and post them to your Tumblr, and then tweet out the links on Twitter to the photos on your Tumblr that your gay porn star already tweeted on his Twitter. The fun never ends!
 

Buy them something (or everything!) off their Amazon Wish List.
A true gay porn fan will show how much he cares by buying his favorite gay porn star the most expensive things from his Amazon Wish List. Any basic fan can buy a gay porn star a pair or underwear or a DVD, but if you really want to get noticed, you need to prove how much of a real fan you are by purchasing him the 128-inch flat screen TV and the MacBook Pro and the Rolex and the 48-light Baccarat Zenith Long Chandelier from his list. It might set you back a few hundred thousand dollars, but can you really put a price tag on a friendship that doesn’t yet exist with someone you’ve never met? No.
 

Show up wherever they’re shooting and wait outside for them!
If social media outreach and the transfer of material possessions hasn’t gotten your favorite gay porn star’s attention, it’s probably just because he’s really busy working. Therefore, the only way to force him to realize that you exist, goddamn it, is to show up at his work and wait. Wait as long as it takes. Most gay porn studios are easy to find once you know what city they’re in, so just figure out who he’s shooting with based on the geo tags from his tweets and the pics of his scene partners he posted to his personal Facebook account, then Google the studio name, locate the address, and show up there unannounced late at night when he’s done filming. He might not know who you are or why you’re standing there in the dark wearing that ski mask and holding that bottle of chloroform, but there will be plenty of time to catch up with your new friend once you’re back in the basement alone together, at last.

I hope these tips help you get the recognition you deserve. Good luck, fans!

 

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23 Responses to “Gay Porn Tips: How To Get A Gay Porn Star To Notice You”

  1. Skooter McGoo says:

    Ha ha ha This was awesome. Having meet a few adult film actors thru the years, I must say I have asked this question before. More in a “what turns porn stars on away from work?” With men always surrounding them, how would one get close and really get to know the person not just the star we put on a pedestal? My best example would be Colby Keller on my radar. Intelligent, well read, comical, artistic, caring, all and all the proper guy to fall in love with for almost any man. I guess it’s time to put Stalkerlicious to the test and go nab myself some of that guy. I want him to spank me, I’m not even 100% sure why. I’m starting to rhyme so it’s off the bed for me with Keller in my dreams if not my arms.

  2. Dutch Courage says:

    But what do you do when your object of desire only speaks Czech, is not on Twitter and has no Amazon wishlist?

  3. KevinOhyap says:

    creepy shit here. I can understand leaving a positive comment and following on a twitter is cool. You would really have to be deciated to start a blog. But fuck seriously buying them shit ? For real ? ‘Stalking’ them. Fuckkkk no. If its come to that for anyone you may as well take all of that money and time and spend it on an actual person you can have.

    • dan says:

      I agree with Kevin when he says not to spend the money on a porn actor and spend it on somebody that you can have
      SO I will now start buying things for Kevin and shipping them to him. Let me know when that wishlist is all set up and ready to go Kevin.

  4. Eddie says:

    If you don’t worry about self-respect and have the financial means for it, give them what they want and have a nice time.

  5. GreekGeek says:

    Good stuff Zach, quite humorous! Maybe you should publish an Amazon Wish List, you’re starting to build quite a fan base yourself………..

  6. GreekGeek says:

    ………I meant to add, that you need to also include gifts for your dog on your Amazon list as well.

  7. OneOfTheManyChris says:

    You forgot “Start a fake twitter account with a name like JohnnyRealRapid.”

  8. T. says:

    I think I’ll skip the first four tips (they need too much commitment) and I’ll go straight to the last one ! LOL
    Just kidding, awesome post Mr Sire !

  9. dissi says:

    another good approach is to find out where they live, rent a van, and pretend you’re moving furniture and ask for their help!

  10. Ghost Chelsea says:

    Zach … this is how Sidfre started …. isnt it ??

  11. mark says:

    TRUTH!!!!!

  12. James says:

    What about saying you’re the performer’s manager, demanding money for services rendered, and then cyber stalk your way into infamy? Doesn’t that work?

  13. Denis says:

    Wouldn’t it just be easier to just contact them through their rentboy profile and pay them $300 to meet you. You then have a whole hour with them! They can carry your luggage, watch you make an ikebana arrangement, or help sew your niece’s christening gown! Porn stars are really useful…

  14. luke_s says:

    The title should be “How To Look and Act Like a Stalker”.

  15. Steve says:

    Unfortunately doing some of these things does not always result in success. There is one porn star that was my all time favorite that performed back in the 90s and did some recent videos a couple of years ago. Have over 600 pictures of him and have bought all 54 of his videos. Even started a blog on him and a Yahoo group for him. I sent him a Facebook friend request and told him he was my favorite gay performer of all time. I mentioned that I had bought every one of his videos, started a fan club for him on Yahoo, and a blog. Well he rejected my Facebook friend request and told me he did not want anything to do with his fans. I did not even get so much as a Thank You from him for being such a devoted fan. Basically, I got the brush-off from him. I guess some porn stars are not very appreciative of their fans.

    • Eddie says:

      You should know that whores like fuckery and money not fans ( or ‘johns’). Six hundred pics…Maybe you were thinking about marriage. L.O.L. Pardon but it needs to be a whore to want a whore’s friendship. Friendship is for good guys and based in similarities and you don’t need to ask for…( It happens ). It’s disgusting to see someone begging for a whore’s friendship when you think they put a price on something that people give for free. Were you asking to participate in the sick dirt mess that is the life those whores choose to live?

      • TonyHarding says:

        uh oh…. someones a little bitter about something. Honey, do you need to talk about your overuse of the word “whore”? Why do you feel the need to judge the men who you know you will never look like and they probably wouldn’t sleep with you even if you paid them. I love how we idolize these men one minute then tear them down the next for being for doing exactly what we expect them to do.

  16. DD says:

    I like to show support to pornstars by purchasing their films or saying a nice comment on a blog. Anything else, for me, seems like doing too much. Today I shout out: Scott Alexander, Shay Michaels, Shane Rollins and Adam Killian!

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