Drinking An Entire Bottle Of “Cum Lube”: Is It Safe?

Welcome to the third installment in The Sword’s new series, “Is It Safe?” Today we’re looking at online retailer Fort Troff’s “Cum Lube”—a personal lubricant that looks and feels exactly like cum—and asking the question: Is it safe? Here is a video demo to help us get to the bottom of things. [Warning: Extremely graphic video of cum guzzling below.]

Because the cocksucker in the wrestling gear (why are they all wearing wrestling gear?) is drinking all of the Cum Lube (not to mention all of the regular cum) in the below video, I decided to look up the ingredients to make sure that Cum Lube is safe to drink. Per Fort Troff, Cum Lube contains the following ingredients:

Water, Cyclopentasilozane, Cyclohexasilozane, Dimethicone, Dimethiconol, Propylene Glycol, Hydroxymethylcellulose, Glycerine, and Methylparaben.

Aside from water, I don’t know what any of those other words are.

A Google search tells me that Dimethicone is used in Silly Putty, so that’s fun, Propylene Glycol is only toxic in extremely high levels, Methylparaben is found in blueberries (yummers!), Methylcellulose is used as a thickener in salad dressings (I love Ranch!), and Glycerine is a sweetener sometimes used in low-fat foods (perfect for gays are on a diet). So…yes! Cum Lube is safe to drink, so guzzle away, you cum-guzzling whores. But just as with drinking real cum, everything in moderation.

I recognize gay porn star Brandon Lewis, but can anyone ID the cocksucker and the other guy?

[Fort Troff]

 

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