Mayor’s Little Fuckbitch Sells Sizzle, Tucks The Steak

We still, optimistically, ran with this headline. But lo and behold, the mayor’s little fuckbitch got shy when it came to doing full frontal, and so the Unzipped May issue (the digitial edition was released yesterday, 1 week ahead of the print edition) contains some sexy but soft-core shots of Beau in the shower and Beau bending over, sans-penis.  The piece accompanying the photos, by editor Sean Carnage, is like mid-20th-century gay pulp fiction, in which a reader must settle for titillating conversation about the cock (and Doris Day) in lieu of resting eyes on the cock itself.

“I jacked off three times last night so I wouldn’t get too excited at the shoot,” Breedlove blurts out when I pick him up the following day. “My cock hurts so bad now.” It’s an interesting way to deal with nerves, but when I arrive at the studio and Beau meets the photographer and the stylist–gay men in the same age range as Mayor Adams–he is instantly at ease. The older men, long used to the terse, gay-for-pay types, instantly bond with Beau, who quotes Green Acres star Eva Gabor at the drop of a hat and names Doris Day as his favorite actress… Beau shows few signs of shyness–except when it comes to exposing his cock. He’s sensitive about being depicted too explicitly after Internet commentators accused him of being a whore and a gold digger.”

Beau Breedlove's Unzipped CoverBeau also explains that it’s not that he only goes for older men like Portland mayor Sam Adams, it’s just that the type he goes for is “a goal-driven guy who has a solid foundation” who also happens to be in his 30s or 40s and running one of the nation’s mid-size liberal cities.

The actual issue hits the stand next Tuesday; in the meantime, if you’re smitten, you can get the special digital edition here (digital reader download required – see one of his shower shots at right).

RELATED:

Portland Mayor’s Little Fuckbitch Will Show Us All His Cock Ass
The Mayor’s Little Fuckbitch Speaks
Unzipped Magazine Courts the Portland Mayor’s Little Fuckbitch
Meet the Portland Mayor’s Little Fuckbitch

Unzipped Digital Downloads (Undercover Mags)

0 thoughts on “Mayor’s Little Fuckbitch Sells Sizzle, Tucks The Steak”

  1. The last time I checked, a guy in his 20s who goes for “‘a goal-driven guy who has a solid foundation’ who also happens to be in his 30s or 40s” is 9 times out of 10 a whore or gold digger. So in other words, he didn’t want to show too much because those Internet commentators are on to him.

    And Unzipped Media is becoming a joke. They used to be worth something. What happening? Who’s now in charge that has made it fall off so miserably?

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