Mason Wyler Doesn't Quite Understand How Escorting Works

Self-proclaimed “King of Bottoms” Mason Wyler isn’t going to let a little rape trauma get in the way of his delightfully whorish ways. On his website Mason writes that a Candian military man recently rejected him. That’s right, people. Even milk-skinned blonde twunks can’t always get what they want. But luckily for someone, Mason is turning lemons into lube:

I’m holding a contest. I figured it’d be more fun to have guys competing for my hole instead of offering it to every guy that tickles my fancy like the slut. INTERESTED?

The rules are simple. Applicants must email a picture of themselves to Mason holding a sign detailing what they want to do to him. (Sample photo on the right.) Mason and his boyfriend, Marcus, will review each entry and post the 5 finalists of their choosing to the website. Then, his readers get to decide on the winner. And when we say winner, we mean winner: an all-expenses-paid fuckfest vacation with Mason and his boyfriend, and a $1,000 cash prize.

Um. Mason? They’re supposed to pay you.

The most exciting aspect of this contest for us is watching the Eeyore-like readers of Mason’s blog slowly realize that they’re ugly. Rav’s_Desire wrote, “….nice competition…Don’t worry, I won’t compete in the race. I’ll lose anyway.” Birttonbi: “This old fat guy would love to have some time with Mason but I know that will never happen. ” Chiguy: “I would LOVE to submit a picture and tell you ALL the NASTY things I would like to do to you but, I know reality and I SURE AM NOT nearly good looking enough to win this contest!!”

And our favorite, from Lance_o_Lot: “I wish i had the “Hunk” type look you liked. :(“

Do you have what it takes to win? Well, then first of all, fuck you, and second, visit his site for details.

(The first picture below is of the Candian military man whose rejection started it all.)